Bubbling Mind

[1] When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands.

[2] If you're being run out of town, get in front of the crowd and make it look like a parade.

[3] From a wedding announcement in the Arlington, Texas, STAR-TELEGRAM: "The bride was given away by her father wearing her mother's veil."

[4] From a legal notice: "The case is now before the court and is awaiting a herring."

[5] Marquee outside a large building-supply store in Utah: "If it's in stock, we've got it!"

[6] It is not what teenagers know that bothers parents. It's how they found out.

[7] An emergency on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.

[8] Don't make your disorganization my emergency.

[9] Responsibility, -- take some -- it builds character.

[10] Pointed remarks are often not the sharpest.

[11] When someone disagrees with you -- it isn't necessary to excuse or justify yourself. Simply accept it and move on!

[12] Myths of Drunks and Idiots: Who ever gets the last word is right -- Who ever yells the loudest is more right.

[13] Don't pet the sweaty stuff and don't sweat the petty stuff.

[14] If you have difficulty laughing at yourself, I'll do it for you.

[15] It's funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious.

[16] I have always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific as to who.

[17] It is better to have loved and lost, than marry a woman you can't defrost.