Corporate Rules

Rule-1 :
The Boss is always right.

Rule-2 :
If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.

Rule-3 :
Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and promotions.

Rule-4 :
Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down".
The more intelligent a person,
The more hardworking a person,
The more committed a person;
The more number of persons are engaged
in pulling that person down.

Rule-5 :
If you are good, you will get all the work.
If you are really good, you will get out of it.

Rule-6 :
When the Bosses talk about improving productivity,
They are never talking about themselves.

Rule-7 :
It doesn't matter what you do,
It only matters what you say you've done
and what you are going to do.

Rule-8 :
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters
from a kick in the butt.

Rule-9 :
Don't be irreplaceable.
If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

Rule-10 :
The more crap you put up with,
The more crap you are going to get.

Rule-11 :
If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit.
No use being a damn fool about it.

Rule-12 :
When you don't know what to do,
Walk fast and look worried.

Rule-13 :
Following the rules will not get the job done.

Rule-14 :
If it weren't for the last minute,
Nothing would get done.

Rule-15 :
Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous".

Rule-16 :
No matter how much you do,
You never do enough.

Rule-17 :
You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work
you are supposed to be doing.

Rule-18
In order to get a promotion,
You need not necessarily know your job.

Rule-19
In order to get a promotion,
You only need to pretend that you know your job.

Rule-20
The last person that quit or was fired will be
held responsible for everything that goes wrong.